Boiling the Boilermakers

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Three Turkeys, Then a Team Full of Them

40 pounds of turkey. Deep fried in all of their splendor. That's what was digested at the tailgate on Saturday in the 7+ hour marathon prior to the game. Fried mushrooms and fried dill pickles on the side, plus the Schaffer dumplings with bean soup, the Goodell family's barely soup, mashed potatoes, cheesy potatoes...and countless other delicious delights. It all filled the tables to capacity as we tried to stay warm and stay dry.

Then Michigan jumped out to a 14-0 lead, and you couldn't have been warmer or dryer. Not enough to call it a game, but that feeling was there. That dominating the Big Ten feeling. The team was back, led by a terrific hard hitting defense that lacked its most storied player, Marlin Jackson. In his absense, the defense stunted and confused the outmatched Boilermakers, scoring on a fumble recovery to close out the rout, and letting up only 3 points to the Big Ten's #3 offense. Michgan wins 31-3.

Don't get yourself all worked up just yet. Better yet, hold off on your Pasendena reservations. Purdue, as is normally the case, is not a great team. The only Purdue win you pointed to going into this game was against Wisconsin, who just this week lost to Northwestern. NORTHWESTERN? PLEEEEASE DON'T MAKE ME WORRY ABOUT NORTHWESTERN! Purdue had excelled against the weakest of the Big Ten with wins over Illinois and Penn State, and non-conference wins against Pac-10 bottom-feeder Arizona, Wake Forest, and Notre Dame...and don't forget about their loss to Bowling Green. So, let me be as clear as I can about this: The fact that we spanked Purdue to give them their first Big Ten loss DOES NOT mean anything with regards to the impending game against Michigan State. Simply put, we are not going to beat Sparty based on the fact we beat Purdue.

Destiny Revisited

First of all, why didn't anybody call me out for misspelling "destiny" on last week's page? No matter, step one is done, and 2 and 1/2 steps remain on the way to a Rose Bowl bid. When the BCS standings come out on Monday evening, you can expect Ohio State, Michigan State, and most likely Michigan to appear there. As if a round-robin tournament, all three of these teams play each other, with the winner most likely headed for the Rose Bowl. Stay tuned...it doesn't get any better than this.

Up Next...Sparty

Michigan Agricultural College and its band of thugs invite us into their crap-hole city to help settle the Big Ten Championship. This week's theme is : The "You Want Fries With That?" tailgate. Bring the fast food of your choice, breakfast, lunch, White Castle...whatever floats your boat. UMTailgate.com will be well represented and in our usual Sparty spot. For information on where we will be parking, contact me at frank@umtailgate.com. Hope to see you all there!

The Final Four: Just Four Games Remain In Quest For Championship

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Goodbye Illini

What happened to the fight in the Fighting Illini? Illinois looked as if they may have been the worst team we've faced all season. Michigan got its ground game and defense back in order, punishing the Illini 56-14 in front of 110K+ at Michigan Stadium. It was good to be home and in our regular tailgate spot, as Italian cuisine filled the tables and Yucca killed our brain cells.

Destiny

Michigan faces a tough test next week, as the 6-1 Purdue Boilermakers come to town. But this is just the first of three remaining tough tests for the Wolverines, who after Purdue's victory over Wisconsin, now control their own destiny with regards to the Rose Bowl. That's right, if Michigan wins out, they will get at least a share of the Big Ten title, and without getting into the tiebreaker specifics, they will be the Big Ten's representative in the Rose Bowl. The Wolverines control there own destiny...but so does John Navarre.

Up Next...Halloween

The Italian Theme went over very well. Thanks to all that participated. Next week, we will celebrate Halloween with a turkey fry. So, wear your best Michigan costume, and we'll see you all there.

Driving Us To Drink

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Can't Lose Them All

The Cubs and Red Sox are in the league championship series. Ohio State lost a close game to Wisconsin. Arnold Schwarzenegger is the Governor of California. Northern Illinois is ranked in the top 20. Translation: The sun shines on a dog's ass now and then. And even on a Friday evening, in a dome, a tiny ray peaked through and hit #16 in the ass, if only for one quarter.

Make no mistake, the Wolverines may have been the lesser of the two teams on the field on Friday, or at least they were playing that way. There were no major miscues, no huge special teams foul ups, and the only turnover was an interception that looked as if it just may have been a great play by the defensive back. And yet, Michigan found itself down 14-0 at the half. They were down because they were out-played. They had no answer for the Minnesota offense, and the Wolverine offense mustered up less than 100 total yards. The third quarter wasn't much better, as Minnesota added another 14, while the Wolverines only score came on a trick play where Steve Breaston tossed a touchdown pass to none other than John Navarre. At the end of three quaters, the Wolverines were in the middle of a drive down the field, but trailed 28-7. I won't lie to you, the four of us that made the trip considered leaving. I received a text message on my cell phone that read "Leave now and beat the traffic." A voice mail said, "Is it really all worth it?" referring to the 20-hour round trip to Minneapolis to see this anemic performance. We decided to hold our decision to leave until after the Wolverines current drive.

A ten-yard touchdown pass from Navarre to Perry made it 28-14, which at that time seemed to just be delaying the inevitable. Faith is not something that appears in a thought that contains John Navarre, so the 14-point differential still seemed insurmountable. But then, just one-minute later, Jacob Stewert intercepted an errant pass and returned it for a touchdown...28-21. Maybe? No, still Navarre. But we're not going anywhere. C'mon defense!

Minnesota then got the ball to mid-field, and a 52-yard run right up the gut by Minnesota QB Abdul-Khaliq was the dagger. I want to leave...but there's so much time left. 11:11 to go...isn't 11:11 supposed to be lucky? I make a wish. Stephen curses the fact that we stayed. One-minute later, Navarre to Edwards for a 52 yard touchdown, 35-28. Maybe? No, still Navarre. DEFENSE!!

A much needed and rare stop is followed by an 8-play, 60-yard drive, which ends with a 10-yard TD run by Chris Perry. TIED? 35-35... and I'm convinced we can't put together back to back defensive stops. But we do. Maybe? No, still Navarre. Pray for overtime. For god's sakes John, don't throw an interception that gets returned for a touchdown. Run it Lloyd...run it. Then time stopped. It was one of those quick moments that seemed to last forever, where you hear your heart beating, as the ball popped out of Chris Perry's hands and bounced up field...right into the hands of a diving Tim Massequoi. Kick it now! Good god, kick it now. Navarre takes a knee, Minnesota burns it's last time out, Rivas lines up and splits the uprights. 38-35. Maybe? YES...MAYBE? Colorado? DEFENSE!!!!!! DEFENSE!!!!!! Then Abdul-Khaliq's hail mary falls short, and into the hands of Markus Curry. And it's over. Michigan wins 38-35? 31 fourth-quarter points?!? A Navarre win against a ranked team on the road? Ahhhh yes, a dog's ass my friends, a dog's ass.

Sans Tailgate

If you recall from last year's trip to the Twin Cities, there is no substantial tailgate at Minnesota, so we actually tailgated on the road...literally. Open container laws aside, we created a theme on the fly (Fried Foods) and our tailgate was catered by Culver's and included fried cheese curds and breaded pork loin sandwiches. I am mentioning this makeshift tailgate in order to explain why there are very few pictures from the trip. To fill in the blanks, I've included some choice pictures from the Godfather's family trip to New York City which occurred in between the trip to Iowa and Minnesota... and created the monniker "Hell Week" to describe the activities of the last 7 days. Enjoy!

Drown Your Sorrows

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Special Ed

It will forever be known as the "Fun Punt Formation". I mean, who knows if we will ever see it again. The criticism it has received has been extraordinary. From Bob Griese in the booth during the game to every radio and tv commentary regarding the game since. So, I'm not sure if Lloyd will have the stones to run it again, but it would be FUN, wouldn't it?

Michigan jumped out to a 14-0 lead in this game, and all was fine in the Wolverine universe, but Iowa finished the game on a 30-13 run from that point, slowly but surely converting every Michigan miscue into some type of points. Once again however, it came to an end with the offense on the field, and an startingly familar overthrown 4th down ball by John Navarre. Iowa 30, Michigan 27.

Hell Week Continues

Minnesota remains. Consequently, the last time we won a road game was last year at Minnesota. Scary thought isn't it?

Big Ten Opener...Yawn

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Wins and Losses

What's worse, an uninspired team posting a crappy defeat, or an uninspired and undeserved victory? Well, I'll take the victory every time, but the next time we have a game like the one on Saturday, I'll also take drugs. Comtemplating a nap in the first quarter, I saw four turnovers through the slits of my eyes. Somewhere between a good dream and a nightmare, I wasn't sure that I saw the correct score on the scoreboard given our poor performance. Then Steve Breaston caught a punt, and I was sure he was down, so I went back to sleep, but I was rudly awakened by fans cheering for a touchdown. Thank god for the replay on the scoreboard, or I would have missed it.

The defense looked somewhat efficent, but the offense was mostly stagnant...not to mention the ridiculous turnovers. The back-ups did a great job of making the game look good for the Hoosiers, allowing two touchdowns in the last five minutes as the Wolverines went on to victory 31-17.

Who Are These Guys?

Charlie Whitehurst, Clemson; Joel Klatt, Colorado; Kevin Kolb, Houston; Bruce Gradkowski, Toledo; Aaron Rodgers, California; Alex Smith, Utah; Ingle Martin, Florida; Ryan Hart, Rutgers; Tye Gunn, TCU; Kellen Clemens, Orgeon; Brad Smith, Missouri; Chris Leak, Florida; Matt Leinart, USC; Eric Greenberg, Colorado; Cory Randolph, Wake Forest; Jay Cutler, Vandy

Answer:

Freshman and Sophomores in the NCAA with better passing effieciency ratings than John Navarre. They represent 16 of the 61 quarterbacks that are better than Navarre in this category. Only Indiana's Matt LoVecchio, Northwestern's Brett Basanez, and Penn State's Zach Mills are worse in the Big Ten.

Hell Week

At Iowa. At Minnesota. Seven days with 34 hours of land travel. I can't promise solid updates during this period, but I will do my best to keep you posted on the activities of the tailgate.