I Don't Live In Your World

My priorities and responsibilities are different than yours.  Perhaps what you do is considered "real life" by definition, and what I do is frivolous and irresponsible.  You're the ant.  I'm the grasshopper.  You probably think about the future in terms of retirement planning and putting your kids through college, while I can't see past the 2012 recruiting boards and the Luau tailgate menu.

And perhaps Rich Rodriguez to you is just some slick weasel car salesman that understands nothing about the tradition and pageantry of Michigan Football...a cheater...DickRod...etc.  To me, he's a misunderstood offensive genius, a master recruiter, and an all around great guy.  Seriously, how is he still pulling in high-starred recruits when 75% of America thinks he won't be here in December?

They're saying this is the most important year in the history of Michigan Football.  I couldn't disagree more.  First of all, 1997 was the most important year in the history of Michigan Football.  And I think to pass judgement on a year of college football before it occurs is a little ignorant.  I mean, if Michigan goes 8-5, 9-4, or even 7-6, Rodriguez will be retained, and this year will just be another year.  We're moving forward.  If we go somewhere in the vicinity of 3-9, and Rodriguez is canned, then the most important season is the coming offseason, when we decide whether to bring in Harbaugh to lead the team 25 years after he, well, lead this team.  In reality, the only way this becomes the most important season in Michigan history is if we go 13-0, 12-1, or 11-2.  In this scenario, Rodriguez is retained, becomes instantly beloved as the haters begin to swoon pretending they were supportive of the regime all along, and recruiting becomes so easy, John L. Smith could do it.  National Championships follow, and we all live happily ever after.  But let me be Frank with you, 13-0, 12-1 and 11-2...they're not happening.

I believe this will be a normal Michigan Football season.  For the uninformed, a normal Michigan Football season is 8-4.  We love 8-4.  However, with these 13-game seasons (14 next year!) 8-4 doesn't really apply, so I'll say 8-5.  And while 8-5 is classified as normal with regards to the 90's, understand that this will be an AMAZING improvement over the last two years, in fact, it would flirt with miraculous.  You might say that going out on a limb predicting 8 wins is just like predicting National Championships every year from 1998 through 2007.

I did that too.

I've dedicated the better part of my life to having the best possible time...at all times...and view the pinnacle of each and every year as those 12 faithful Saturdays in the fall.  In my time as a devotee, I have felt so many different types of pain that my psyche should probably be studied by a professional.  Clearly too many instances to mention here.  Besides, most of you have felt the same pain, at the same time.  Michigan Football hurts.

But everything is different now.

The past has been filled with over-promising and under-delivering...high rankings proven undeserved.  We used to be so disappointed in them when they would lose that first game, undoubtedly a game they weren't supposed to lose. We'd curse their effort, mock the gameplan, blame the officiating.  It's funny, I always imagined, though never thought possible, the arrival of this day of reckoning.  In my dreams it hurt worse.  Maybe it's because I'm older, but this pain doesn't have the intensity of the past pain.  Toledo was a breeze to overcome when compared to App State.  Losing to Northwestern in 2008 was childsplay (weather aside) by comparison to when they nipped us with a last second field goal in 1996, or when Train fumbled in 2000.

We used to spend all of our time looking for answers:  Why does John Navarre throw balls off of lineman's heads?!?  Why does Jeremy LeSeur bite on that fake every time?!?  Why do we run 5 yard outs on 3rd and 8?!?

We never did figure anything out.

Today the answers are simple:  We start walk-ons on defense, our defense sucks,  and we turn the goddamn ball over too much.

With all of our great history it's difficult to admit that we are starting over.  A bonafied underdog.  Off the radar.  Not a single preseason magazine even teases us as a sleeper.  Not one even has us above fifth place in the Big Ten.  We are humbled in a way that we never thought could happen.  Let me ask you this...do you think they'd be discussing moving The Game if we had been a little more competitive the last two seasons?  And don't pretend we were in it last year just because they decided to play Tresselball at halftime.

Perhaps now we won't take anything for granted.  Perhaps we will pay attention.  Cheer first downs.  Stand up and fight for a team that needs us.  Don't you think it might be time to support a coach that should be creating masterful gameplans instead of trying to appease a bunch of spoiled assholes worrying about who is wearing the stupid #1 jersey.

It's time to play.  Welcome to my life.

3 freakin' days.

UMTailgate.com 2000-2010: We Celebrate 10 Years of Tailgating the Internets

10 years ago, things were different.

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Back then, there were questions going into the season, but not the kind of questions we have today.  We wondered if redshirt freshman John Navarre could carry the reigns until Drew Henson's stress fracture healed, pondering if that would be what stopped us from winning all of our games.  Because we used to think like that.  Not a season was started where we didn't feel like we had legitimate chance of beating everybody on our schedule.  We didn't think in terms of bowl games, because they were an absolute given.  We didn't wonder how many wins it would take for Lloyd to keep his job, we only bitched about his offensive playcalling.  It was a time just before recruiting coverage got out of hand, so we were mostly blind to the shortcomings of our secondary, and we didn't care, because we knew we had enough, because we always had enough.  We were in the midst of the longest streak of being in the top 25 in the history of college football.  At this time of year, we would complain because our ranking was too low.  Now we wonder if we will crack the "other's receiving votes" paragraph at the end of the list.

Our team was full of nationally recognized names:  David Terrell, Anthony Thomas, Steve Hutchinson, Drew Henson.  Some of them were even Heisman trophy contenders.  We spent half of 2000 in the top 10, only falling out after the Drew vs. Drew debacle in West Lafayette.  I was 24 years old, Purdue overcame that 28-10 halftime deficit, and I heard my dad drop an F-bomb for the first time.

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Ahhh, the memories.

Tailgates were different back then too.  I didn't really know these people...

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I remember feeling left out when they did this.  I wasn't quite in the family yet.  And take a look at this pic...

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Seriously, click on it to zoom in and look at the food in the background.  We used to eat fiddle faddle and fruit salad.  A simpler time indeed.  Now we do this...

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Also, Captain Michigan used to leg wrestle...

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...now he doesn't do shit except sit around and make people feel sorry for him because he's gotta drink root beer and regular rum by doctor's orders.  Just kidding...I love you Larry.

Anyway, as we make our way to the new tailgate space at Pioneer for our season opening Luau this Saturday, we will reach a milestone.  A milestone that I'm particularly proud of, and that I'm pretty sure nobody else has crossed...

10 years of tailgating exploits plastered all over the internet.

Sure, I could have realized how much people enjoyed pictures and commentary on those pictures, and then went on to invent facebook...but I didn't, and that's good because I would have been one of those really pompous asshole rich people.  I would have had Zingerman's bring the food in every week for the tailgate, and I wouldn't have invited any of you poor folk.

So ya, there's that.

5 days.

Things Are Different Now

​Going into Saturday's game, I really had no opinion on the outcome.  I didn't know, on any level, what was going to happen when Michigan took the field.  I mean, I knew what I wanted to happen, but I was probably more preoccupied with what I didn't want to happen.  I didn't want the euphoric feelings I felt after Western Michigan to be erased by a loss at the hands of the Irish.  Overcoming the adversity of practice-gate and the anti-Rich Rod rhetoric by way of a 31-7 victory was a really big deal.  But people don't want to hear about what you did for them yesterday, they want to hear about today.  I thought a lot about what people would think following a loss to Notre Dame.  I would have certainly been an apologist:  Notre Dame has a good team...Michigan is young and when they get more experience watch out...Next year is the year, maybe the year after that...yada yada yada.  But I don't have to worry about that anymore.  Because a group of very young men and a coach under fire have decided they don't want to wait.  They want it all...right now.

Though I don't do it very much in my day-to-day life, and I attend religious services about as often as I root for Michigan State, I find myself praying sometimes at football games.  I literally look to the sky with my hands folded, thinking there's some higher power that isn't busy with famine or disease or world peace that has time to fix a football game.  I was just in the middle of of something along the lines of "if you let Michigan win I'll volunteer at a..." when my connection was interrupted by Seven Nation Army and an entire section of students whipped into a frenzy.  This whole piped in music thing is so simple, so effective, that I can't believe we waited so long to implement it.  But that is just one of the many New Michigan Traditions.  The Victor's Walk, the honorary captains, and the team immediately sprinting towards the student section following a victory to sing The Victors, were brought here by Rich Rodriguez and are designed for one thing: FUN.

Michigan football, everything about it, is fun, perhaps for the first time.  From the play on the field, which is like some kind of wild circus of speed and trickery with a ringmaster that would've gone to prom four months ago if he didn't have spring practice, to the players seemingly as intent on getting us into the game by flapping their arms and pointing to crowd as they are with making the next play.  Rich Rodriguez, whose recruiting prowess grows with every early signee, made a pitch to the most stubborn of prospects.  And though two games, by showing what can happen when the right personnel runs a system, by saying all the right things, and by shedding a few tears, Coach has landed the biggest recruit in Michigan Football history...us.  We are on this team.  We are the 12th man.  We are All-In.

"Everybody kept saying a freshman couldn't do it," Michigan quarterbackTate Forcier said. "I did it."

Michigan is now ranked, which, as I discussed earlier in the week, changes the chemistry of the situation.  There are expectations now.  We are all assuming 4-0 going into Michigan State, and following Sparty's celebration of Mark Dantonio's contract extension by losing to Central Michigan for the third time, things are looking pretty good for our afternoon in East Lansing.  But we need to remember that despite Tate now being college football's poster boy for "freshman poise under pressure," he has yet to have his back against the wall with a stadium of people that want him dead.  The plus side is that we seem to have two consecutive cupcakes in front of us, which means that Tate...and please don't forget Denard...are going to be three weeks older, three weeks better, with two more games worth of plays and film analysis to help them.

But I'm here to tell you not to get ahead of yourself, to remember that while they are fearless and talented, they are still kids...and it's a long long season.  So let's just relax and enjoy these next two weeks, and revel in this miraculous start.

"I told them after the game, they have to stay hungry and humble. It's two wins. They'll get some respect back, but it's still a long way to go. If they stay humble and hungry, then some of that national respect that all of us want, our fans want, our players want, they'll get it." - Rich Rodriguez

UMTailgate.com Featured on AnnArbor.com

Thanks to James Dickson of AnnArbor.com (the artist formerly known as the Ann Arbor News) for a great article that appeared online last night and on the cover of the Sunday paper this morning.  We've found ourselves the subject of a newspaper article or two in our tenure as UMTailgate.com, but Dickson's article captured the essence of what we do in a way the others didn't.

And perhaps the ultimate compliment is that AnnArbor.com photographer Angela Cesere took a break from shooting video and photos...and from a diet that does not include meat...to sample the ribs.

Ahhhh UMTailgate.com, converting vegetarians one game at a time.

Trying To Look Forward

So, I've watched Michigan vs. Western Michigan like five times.  Which is to say I've watched the first half like ten times, Denard's run about 20 times, and that perfect pass from Tate to Junior about 25 times.  The importance of that game, at the time it took place, was so paramount.  I can only hope that it becomes the opening act on something amazing... something that shocks the world of college football.  Because that's why we tailgate, that's why I'll be up until 3am tonight starting 12 racks of baby backs, that's why we follow this team with such passion.  We want our expectations exceeded. It's something so rare for a program of our stature, that I can only think of one time that it happened.  But if it ever were to happen again, it's in this season, where our expectations are so low that we are hoping to break even, or to just make a bowl.

But after one game, that's not enough anymore.  We have one game to challenge us in the month of September.  One game that will change everything.  One game in which we find ourselves as the underdog.  One game in which we can truly exceed expectations.  And that game is this Saturday.  If Michigan beats Notre Dame, a team that is as overhyped as it has ever been (and that's saying something), the Wolverines will effectively have three weeks of bliss before going into East Lansing.  They will be ranked.  They will be on the tips of the tongues of every talking head in the business.  They will be 4-0.

It is then that they will then have to live up to new expectations.

Let's enjoy this time, while we are still unsure, while we still have no expectations, while we still have questions.  Was Western just that bad?  Was the way things clicked so well just a fluke?  How will this very young team respond to adversity?

If Michigan loses, will you still be ALL-IN?

Notre Dame brings a portly coach and a fruity quarterback into Ann Arbor, with a supporting cast that is a year older and wiser than the team we faced last year.  We, for all intents and purposes, are a year or two younger and dumber.  If the past wasn't the past, if Notre Dame wasn't returning to glory, and Michigan wasn't coming off of a 3-9 season, Notre Dame on paper, from man to man, is more talented and more experienced.  But on Saturday, Notre Dame is bringing with it the weight of the complete demise of a program, and the weight of Charlie Weis, who will probably never hear his home crowd chant his name.  We'd like to think we've exercised our demons, that the one year was a fluke, that we will get better every week, that Rich Rodriguez's system will work.  And it's because we believe...because we will be behind our team at home, and because our guys are just young enough not to understand the gravity of the matchup and just want to play football...that we are in a better position to win.

To hell with Notre Dame.