Ready, Set, Tailgate

The Slowest Week of the Year

Note to self: Find something to do this week to keep mind off of impending season.

Like a five-year-old waiting for December 19th to turn into December 25th, I can't seem to find a way to ease the restlessness and anticipation for the upcoming college football season. It's now August 24th, and less than six days remain before we will gather in our famed corner of the golf course. No doubt, we will come together as we always do, which is as if we had been doing it all summer.

How High?

Preseason rankings are high for the Wolverines, #4 and #7 in the AP and coaches poll respectively. In addition, with the Clarett scandal, every college football analyst is scrambling to attach themselves to the Wolverines, both as the Big Ten champion and as a potential Sugar Bowl representative. Without a doubt, this is the most preseason hype We've had since the creation of UMTailgate.com. Be weary, as this is a double edged sword. This takes some pressure off of Ohio State as they were the mark, the team everyone else circled on their schedule. Of course, they still will be, at least until they lose. But OUR potential as it pertains to the media will only add to the fire that burns inside the teams of the Big Ten to beat Michigan.

Not that I condone looking past any games, but assume we beat Central and Houston...the mark begins to shift towards us. Any slip up, or even a close game, by anyone in the top 6 (coaches poll) or the top 3 (AP poll) and we slide up. Get out of the non-conference schedule undefeated, followed up by a cupcake (Indiana) to open Big Ten action, and the real season starts. We BECOME the mark. At Iowa, at Minnesota, Illinois, Purdue, at MSU, at Northwestern, OHIO STATE...that's a lot of teams gunning for us. Depending on what the rest of the country does, we may even hit a point where we are the National MARK, ranked #1. That can be deadly for a team, because everybody wants to beat #1 as bad as they want to beat their biggest rival. We become everyone's biggest rival. Are the Wolverines ready for that pressure? Or will they falter early, making it all a moot point?

That Feeling

To partially quote Coach Norman Dale "I know playing in the championship game in the Sugar Bowl is beyond your wildest dreams, so let's just keep it right there." Watch yourselves for delusions of grandeur, for the predictions you make, for the trash that you talk to that jackass Buckeye in your office telling you about Clarett's backup and how they're not going to lose a step. All of these things have a way of coming back to bite you in the ass. I beleive in the karma. Be humble, because humble pie tastes so much better when you are the one serving it to those son's-of-bitches on January 5th. Of course, I am preaching this message both to you, the tailgating public, and to myself. I personally won the National Championship for the Buckeyes by taking a 10 to 1 bet from a Buckeye fan on the Fiesta Bowl. I've eaten the humble pie. It tastes like shit and it sticks in your teeth so you taste it for 8 months.

The Box Picks the Bucks

Once again to avoid my personal bias, the season has been simulated, this year by NCAA Football 2004 for the X-Box. Similar to last year, the scores will come on a per game basis. According to the X-Box the Wolverines will finish the season 11-2, culminating their season with a trip to the Orange Bowl to play the Miami Hurricanes. Ohio State plays against, unbelievably, Oregon State in the Sugar Bowl, and defeats them handily to win a second consecutive National Championship. Of course, the X-Box doesn't know that Maurice Clarett is missing the first half of the season, so take this whole thing for what it is...a bunch of randomnly generated numbers crunched by a black box in my living room...which probably makes it a little more accurate than Lee Corso (who by the way has Michigan and Oklahoma in the Sugar Bowl).

Get Leid

Don't forget, dust off your pineapples for the first tailgate, which is a Luau themed event. Get your recipes together, and coordinate with Sister Kristen AKA Bubba's Wife to find out what we might need to make the theme run smoothly. She can be contacted at theme@umtailgate.com.

Let the Debate Begin

Unhealthy Addictions

I can't stop playing NCAA 2003 for the X-Box. It has become a serious problem. In anticipation of the coming season, and because I can't bear to watch the Colorado game on ESPN Classic anymore, I have actually watched the computer play itself on several occasions. The realism is ridiculous, and JJ (soon to be nicknamed The Firestarter) and I have often bet on the games being played. Upon being greeted by Lloyd Carr saying "It's in the game." when I started up this afternoon, I felt the fantasy world and the real world were coming dangerously close.

Sound ridiculous? It is. But the college football and tailgating season is supposed to be ridiculous. Come one, come all, and live a fantasy life with your surrogate family. Don't worry, they're all alcoholics, so you'll fit right in. Throw all your cares aside, except for one. Rest your laurals in the hands of a group of 18-24 year old amazingly conditioned atheletes wearing the most recognizable uniforms in all of sport, and plan your Sundays accordingly, for sulking or celebrating, but know that the family will return the following week to do it all again.

The Simulated 2002 Overview

So, in an attempt to make a season preview without my Michigan tilted mind involved, I used the NCAA 2003 for the X-Box. First, let's look at the the final season rankings up to Michigan after all of the games were simulated.

1. Texas

2. Florida

3. Miami

4. Oklahoma

5. Oregon

6. Utah (yes, Utah)

7. UCLA

8. Ohio State

9. Florida State

10. Marshall

11. LSU

12. Michigan

Texas wins the National Championship, beating Miami in the Fiesta Bowl. Florida QB Rex Grossman wins the Heisman, throwing for 4587 yards and 51 TDs....thats alot of friggin' TDs.

Michigan's game by game analysis will come week by week as the season progresses, but Michigan will end the season with 10 wins, and 3 losses. Michigan earned a bid to the BCS, and travelled to New Orleans for the Nokia Sugar Bowl. They reached as high as #4 in both polls during the season.

Statistically...

John Navarre completed just over 50% of his passes (157/302) throwing for 2216 yards with 18 TDs and 13 INTs. Spencer Brinton received limited action, going 24/42 with 1 TD and 1 INT. Ronald Bellamy caught the bulk of the receptions, with 660 yards and 8 TDs.

Chris Perry leads the team with 979 yards rushing and 11 TDs. BJ Askew came in with 439 yards and 6 TDs.

Defensively, Marlin Jackson lead the team with 6 INTs and 2 defensive touchdowns. Victor Hobson lead the team in tackles with 61.

On the special teams front, Philip Brabbs went 15/22 on field goals, his longest being a 44 yarder.

Summing Up

What does this all mean? Well, considering the lackluster output by the offense, the defense must have stepped up and scored some points as well as giving Michigan some solid field position. That may be the story on the field this year. However, I would hate to weather those 13 interceptions given up by John Navarre. So there it is, the season in review...er, uh...preview. Whatever, August 31 is coming up awfully quick, so I will have to set down the controller, and pick up my mug. Note to Godfather: Bring enough Coke.

Next week: Washington preview

GO BLUE!!!

The Webmaster

Are You Ready For Some...Alcohol?

The Tailgate

And so it begins. A group of people that have seen each other only a few times in the last eight months will soon be congragating every Saturday through Thanksgiving...plus a Bowl game (god willing). At 8am on Saturday, September 1st we will begin a ritual known as the Tailgate. Stronger than any religion, deeper than any bond, and often more exciting than the four hour contest that it precludes...the Tailgate is a time to drink in excess, eat in excess, gamble on the last digits in the score, catch up with old friends, and make new friends... all while wandering around in a constant buzz.

The Participants

Fame used to be contained by the confines of the golf course. Now, with every aspect of our tailgating life being displayed to the entire United States (and Bolivia) there is no doubt that The Godfather, Captain Michigan, The Madhatter, Bubba, and Stephen W will become household names by season's end. I can barely contain my excitment at the prospects of the first UMTailgate.com Tailgating action.

The Streak

Shall I compare them to Joe DiMaggio? ...or perhaps Cal Ripken? Among our tailgating crew there are a few of us that plan to attend each and every game this season. But there are two individuals that will reach a pivotal milestone on September 1. Bubba and Stephen will be attending their 50th straight Michigan game (that's home and away). I can't begin to express the respect I have for their endurance. They've dealt with wins, losses, and bringing their wives on road trips. Their travels have taken them to the Rose Bowl, Hawaii, and Florida...among countless trips to the universities of the Big Ten. So, when you see these guys on September 1... be sure to tip your Michigan hat in their direction.

Just Who Do I Think I Am?

Well, I'm not a sport's analyst...that's for sure. I am always happy to offer my opinion on The Team...most of the time in an optomisitic manner, and especially when Tuba comes to town and fires me up. So, for the purposes of this website, I will be using a complicated simulator (NCAA Football 2002 for the Playstation 2)to make predictions on the season instead of my biased heart. This is what the simulator came up with after I ran through the whole 2001 season (this assumes Spencer rides the pine):

Michigan finishes the seaon 8-4, tied for 3rd in the conference. They win their bowl game against Georgia Tech, and end up #14 in the coaches poll, and #12 in the AP poll. Chris Perry and Tim Bracken combine for 1300 yards, 13 TD's, and just 1 fumble. John Navarre throws for 2382 and 12 TD's.

Miami wins the National Championship. Heisman Trophy: DeShaun Foster - UCLA (runner-up Tico)

Down To Business

First and foremost...you're all invited. I can't guarantee a parking spot, but I can guarantee you a beer and some chex mix. Stop by and see us, get your picture taken, and you might even get your grill depicted on UMTailgate.com.

Thanks for stopping by...

-The Webmaster