Divine Disaster

The Blame Game

I've said it all in the last 24 hours. Every possible insult. I've maligned our line, our receivers, our corners, and most importantly, our coach. I questioned motivation of the players, the playcalling, and even the gameplan in general. But I, like you, am just a fan. I know about as much about the X's and O's in division 1 college football as I do about the X's and O's in college soccer. I know very little about Chad Henne, and even less about Matt Gutierrez. Referring back to the 2003 season, I cannot explain to you what the difference was between the 53 carry, 212 yard performance by Chris Perry against Michigan State, and his 9 carry 18 yard performance against Oregon. I cannot explain to you why John Navarre showed the ultimate poise and leadership leading Michigan to their greatest comeback of all time in a sold-out, raucous Metrodome, but folded like a tent against Iowa.

I can only tell you what I feel. And feeling is all a fan truly has. The feeling you get when you hear about a great recruit choosing Michigan. The feeling you get before a season starts. The feeling you get when you're in a college town on the road, or the site of a bowl game, and you share an anonymous hi-five with someone else donning maize and blue garb. It's that feeling that keeps you coming back. It's why you tailgate. It's why you would spend your last dollar to park your car, or fill your tank of gas to make it to Penn State. It's why you're superstitious, and you wear those ridiculous yellow socks. It's why you sit in the rain, the sleet, the cold, the sweltering heat, for hours on end, even though you would have remained indoors all-day if there was no game.

But there is a price to pay for that feeling. And no, it's not monetary. Your heart and soul is invested in gameday. Whether you're in the stands, at a bar, or just sitting home by yourself, your emotions are dictated by the young men wearing the maize and blue. When they are unsuccessful, you are in ruins. You want to point a finger. You want to lay blame. For several years, I've directed that finger (whether justified or not) at John Navarre. The main reason being that pointing your finger at what you saw last is the most simple. At the end of most Navarre led losses, I saw John toss up an interception, miss an open receiver, take an ill-advised sack, or bounce a ball off a lineman's helmet, all on a final drive. And let's be clear here, I am not backtracking on my disdain for John and his career. But following my line of reasoning, I guess I have to blame the kickoff team for not recovering that onside kick at the end. Ridiculous, but not any more ridiculous than blaming anyone else on the team.

Michigan lost their 5th consecutive road opener, 28-20 on Saturday, giving the all-time win percentage lead back to Notre Dame, and restoring prosperity to a program in shambles. It was a bad game for the Wolverines, often difficult to watch. A frustrating, mind-boggling defeat at the hands of an inferior team. Deja vu would be an understatement. So who's fault was it?

Do not blame Chad Henne. This guy has filled the role just fine, and played well in his first road game, throwing for 240 yards on 25 of 40 passing. Saying that Navarre would have won that game is just ignorant. How many games did John Navarre win when Michigan averaged less than 2 yards per carry? None. In fact, he lost many where the running game was potent. Do not blame Braylon Edwards. While the ball that he should have caught that was tipped up for an interception may have been the most blatant mistake you saw on Saturday, don't let it make you forget Avant's fumble after his catch, or Breaston's muffed punt. Do not blame Coach Carr. This is tough for me, because before I watched the replay of the game tonight, I laid it all on him. But he is dealing with a very difficult situation. A freshman is at quarterback, which by all indications is his best option, but no-doubt has resulted in a watered-down playbook. Carr wanted a day of defense and ball-control through the running game. You can't get that if you can't run, but you also can't get that throwing the ball 50 times. Cautious? Yes. Conservative? Maybe. But Michigan football nonetheless.

Don't let yourself fall into the pregame, poll-driven hype (in other words, don't be me). This was a rivalry game. This was a tough road game in a tough road stadium by a team that had been thinking about a 38-0 drubbing for 365 days. This was a TEAM loss. The inability to get touchdowns instead of field goals, followed by untimely turnovers that left our defense in horrible situations, kept Notre Dame in the game for too long. Eventually, they were going to capitalize, and they did.

As much as it feels like it, this is not judgment day for Michigan football. This is not the end of a great run. We will recover. We will fix the offense. We will win games, and some of them will be big. People may start to not believe in Michigan football, and it seems that is when we become the most comfortable. Disregard us and we become the most dangerous team in in the country. Believe me, I feel it.

GO BLUE!

Hey Kid, You're In

Youth Wins Out Over Experience

Two weeks ago, TheWolverine.com released their quarterback scouting report. They discussed Matt Gutierrez, the national media's consensus heir apparent to John Navarre. They discussed Clayton Richard, two-sport star and southpaw, who looked like the number one backup. They also discussed Chad Henne. Expecting to read the phrase "will be red-shrited" I was surprised to instead read that he was leaps and bounds ahead of his development schedule, and was competing not only to back-up Matt Gutierrez, but also to replace him. The quote on the page read "don't be surprised if Chad Henne starts the season opener". A flabergasting if not unbelievable turn of events...that a 19 year old freshman that arrived on campus in August, and had participated in just 27 practices, was primed to challenge two guys that had participated in almost 4 years of reps combined.

Then Monday came, and the announcement was made. Matt Gutierrez will be the quarterback. But as if hiding behind a veil of secrecy, Coach Carr would not discuss the backup quarterback, nor would he discuss how he told the quarterbacks who would start. Is that a secret? The method with which you tell your quarterbacks their order on the depth chart? Michigan conspiracy theorists unite, because I submit that the job was still up for grabs. Camp arm? Camp arm doesn't keep you out of your first ever start as a Wolverine QB. Either you've got a serious injury that we aren't privied to hear about, or your ego is more sore than your shoulder...or as discussed today at the press conference, your elbow. The wall was high around Fort Schembechler for the remainder of the week leading up to Saturday's kick off. The Free Press plastered a full-face page of Gutierrez on the Friday sports section. Nobody knew. In fact, nobody knew until an hour before kickoff, when word began to trickle in. Gutierrez injured. Henne's got the start.

Believe it. A true freshman is quarterbacking your team. Yes, he was a bit shaky at first. And yes, it wasn't the offense you expected. However, there is no reason to think that things would have been better if #12 had lined up under center. We hide our offense. We hide sets, we hide plays. We hide them from three teams: Notre Dame, Michigan State, and Ohio State. So if you truly believed that Matt Gutierrez was the quarterback that was going to lead the Michigan Wolverines to the promised land, then believe this... Chad Henne is better than Matt Gutierrez, and is better equipped to lead you to the land you so desire.

On Saturday however, we didn't need a quarterback, we didn't need a running back. In fact, the offense didn't even need to take the field. A smothering Wolverine defense dismantled the vaunted attack of Miami of Ohio, forcing seven turnovers and putting the Wolverine offense in position to score on almost every possession...if they didn't put it in the end zone themselves. Michigan routed Miami of Ohio 43-10, a rout that looks great on paper, to the rest of the country, and to the poll voters. But a closer look shows that the Wolverines sustained only one drive of more than 50 yards, and that the anemic offense had trouble running the ball, averaging only 2.9 yards per carry against a MAC school. Last year the Wolverines averaged under three yards per carry only four times... three of those were losses. So let's hope that the plays we were hiding on Saturday were from our ground game.

And We Tailgate...Hawaiian Style

Luau music filled the air, pineapple rum filled our glasses, and leis adorned our chests. After over eight months of being apart, we reunited with old friends. Between hugs and toasts, we reminisced about previous seasons, talked of our summer exploits, and debated the 125th edition of Michigan football. We didn't miss a beat: food, fun, friends, football...and yellow socks. It's what we live by from September through November, and what we pine for from January through August.

The Best Football Team in Ohio?

They're Not Scared

On Saturday, September 4th, 2004, the Miami of Ohio football team will bring their team to the Big House. And they've been here before. In 2001, Redshirt Sophomore quarterback John Navarre took the helm after Drew Henson was wooed by the evil empire. A young phenom named Roethlisberger lined up under center for the Redhawks. Calvin Bell and BJ Askew had to come up big on offense, and some timely interceptions gave Michigan a 31-13 win. Let me refresh your memory a bit... we scored once on a 4th and goal play-action pass, a holding call negated a 41-yard touchdown for the RedHawks to start the second half, the Wolverines were stopped on a 4th and 1 play. It wasn't pretty, and it could have been MUCH closer. Now these same kids are seniors, and they're coming back...albeit without Ben Roethlisberger.

I'm not trying to say that we're going to lose this game. Instead, I am trying to make you aware that this team is not a pushover. A win over this team is not just some crap win over a crap team. If and when we defeat this team, it will mean something. The RedHawks finished last season ranked #10 IN THE NATION. They return two receivers that combined for over 2300 yards, a linebacking core that includes John Busing, who led the nation in interceptions by a linebacker, with 5...including 2 he returned for touchdowns. And let's not forget Ryne Robinson, Miami of Ohio's answer to Steve Breaston who broke Miami and MAC records for single season punt return yardage. An underdog with impeccable special teams and senior leadership is often the recipe for disaster.

Trivia: Who has the nation's longest winning streak? Answer: None other than Miami of Ohio, who after Saturday's win over Indiana St, 49-0, increased their winning streak to 14 games. They last lost on August 30th, 2003. OVER A YEAR AGO. They lost 21-3 to Iowa. We lost 30-27 to Iowa last year, and 34-9 in 2002...on homecoming in the Big House.

That Voodoo That We Do So Well

Well my friends the time has come. Dust off your yellow socks, the 2004 season is here. Well, that is unless you are Captain Michigan, who has been known to wear yellow socks year round. Here are some suggestions (Big 11 of them) to make your tailgating season fun and exciting:

#1: Bring Something. I don't care if it's a steaming bowl of poop, although bonus points go to those who surprise us with unique cuisine, unique drinks, unique outfits, or unique personalities.

#2: Eat Something. Dual reasons for this. First, we've got too much food, I promise...just stay out of Godmother's cheesy potatoes. Second, you'll need something of substance in your gullet if you want to follow tip #3...

#3: Drink Something. Bring a giant mug and fill it with a cocktail of your choosing. Bring a cooler of beer and empty it into your belly before kickoff. Take a tug on the bowl of Yucca. When it gets cold, sip a mug of spiked coffee. In short, get drunk, because you're alot cooler when you're drunk. And let's not forget, the best tailgating stories always seem to include...(insert person here) had a lot to drink, and then he/she fell down (into the bushes / on the stadium steps / into that girl's chest). Later (he / she) groped the (daughter / son) of (insert former tailgater here). We found (him / her) passed out (on the grass outside the stadium / in their car / under their car).

#4: Hug the Godfather. Why? Because we said so. Especially if you have no idea who he is. Because the Godfather loves to get himself some "strange". Even better, if you liked it, you can do it again the following week...because the Godfather never remembers you the first time.

#5: Respect the Hall. The members of the UMTailgate.com Hall of Fame. Recognize them, respect them, honor them. Don't know who they are? Check the flag. Tip your hat to Bubba and Stephen too. They've been to 88 straight home and away Michigan games, and they're not even in the Hall...yet.

#6: Learn to Love. Respect all of the tailgaters, even those from the opposing team that are visiting us and wallowing in our dynasty and tradition. This applies to everyone except...

#7: Learn to Hate. Michigan State. Ohio State. And just for this year, Iowa. Don't mistakenly wear their T-shirts, their hats, and in most cases, their colors. This applies to tailgating and gamedays only...however, big bonus points if you apply this rule in your daily life, like me.

#8: Go to the Game. And try to make it there before kickoff.

#9: Go to an Away Game. Ya, we tailgate there too. Everything this year is within easy driving distance, so quit being a candy ass and put on a white jersey.

#10: Ask Goody To Show You His Tattoo. It's not imperative for your enjoyment, but it makes me laugh.

#11: Follow the Theme. Yes, each tailgate has a theme, and this week's theme is luau. So put on a lei and bring some pineapple-upside-down cake.

Following these suggestions will provide you with the best opportunity for an enjoyable gameday afternoon. Hope to see you there.

Click here for the Miami of Ohio preview page.

Percentage Watch

Notre Dame: wins 796 losses 258 ties 41 percentage .746

Michigan: wins 833 losses 274 ties 38 percentage .744

Up Next... Miami of Ohio postgame!

GO BLUE!

The Webmaster

It's Time

7-Year Itch

Year after year. Blue-chip recruit after blue-chip recruit. Promise after promise. Where is the big payoff? The National Championship we pine for each year only makes us crazy. No player on the roster has seen better than a 3-0 start to a season. Lately, the race has been over before it's started. In 2000, it was UCLA. In 2001, it was Washington. In 2002, it was Notre Dame's return to glory. In 2003, it was Oregon and their crowned field.

Yes, 3 out of 4 of these were west coast trips. We don't have one of those this year.

Yes, 4 out of 4 of these came with a (being nice here) less-than-clutch (save Minnesota 2003) quarterback at the helm. He graduated.

But since 1999, the Wolverines have not once strung together more than 6 straight wins in any one season. Running the table in the Big Ten has been a big enough challenge, let alone an undefeated season. And now, entering the 2004 season, we are left with question marks at THE two skill positions, QB and HB. As much as I look to him as the savior of the team, Matt Gutierrez and his undefeated high school career is unproven at the collegiate level. David Underwood has never looked like a gamebreaker in mop-up action for Chris Perry, but he will get the nod when the season starts.

Mix in a few losses in the trenches and that should be enough. Enough to slap the "rebuilding year" monniker on the 125th edition of Michigan Football and call it successful when we lose four games and head to the Outback Bowl.

But then you look at the media's top picks for the Big Ten and you'll find that each of the teams listed are sporting new QB's this year. And none of these new QB's are throwing to a more talented group of receivers. Edwards, Avant, and Breaston. You'll look back in a few years and say those names together, amazed that all of them played on the same team at the same time.

And then you look at successful Michigan seasons of the past, namely 1997, and you'll notice that a running back mix can be more successful than just a single running back. And we are deep at this position, very deep if freshman Max Martin makes his mark.

And then you bask in the reloading power of the Wolverines on offensive and defensive line. Competition breeds success, and word out of camp is that spots are still up for grabs with less than two-weeks to go.

Finally, you become optomistic. If you listen to the prognosticators, defensive captain Marlin Jackson will be leading one of the nation's top defensive squads. Michigan is a concensus top-10 pre-season team. Michigan is picked to repeat as Big Ten champions. By default, that puts the Maize and Blue in the National Championship hunt as long as they survive the non-conference schedule. We will be building on last year, when the Wolverines had inexcusable early season losses. Oregon should not have beaten us, and a 14-0 first quarter lead at Iowa should have put them away. Senior leadership will make this point. We CAN avoid the early upset.

But how will these Wolverines handle the spotlight if they enter Big Ten action undefeated? They have the talent, they have the seniors, they have the schedule. But do they have the swagger, the x-factor we are looking for to satisfy our 7-year itch?

15 short weeks from now the story will be told. Miami or Tampa? South Beach or Mons Venus? Two destinations so close in proximity couldn't be further from each other with respect to college football.

How do I get by? Well, get your leis out. There's at least seven trays of cheesy potatoes to eat before these Wolverines solidify their legacy.

X-Box Says: "Deja Blue"

I will now present the unbiased predictions of the X-Box and NCAA Football 2005.

Michigan will go 9-3 on the season, winning the Big Ten title outright once again, but falling short in any National Championship bid. They end the season ranked #11. The Big Ten standings have Purdue, Ohio State, and Minnesota following the Wolverines.

Steve Breaston earns first-team All-American honors with 2000 all-purpose yards and 10 all-purpose touchdowns. Gutierrez, despite missing a game with an ankle injury, comes in 2nd for national QB of the year, and joins Breaston and Edwards as All-Big Ten first team honorees.

Carnell Williams of Auburn wins the Heisman trophy. Florida State wins the National Championship, defeating Kansas State in the Orange Bowl. The final top 11 in the country are:

Florida State

West Virginia

Georgia

Miami

Tennessee

USC

Oklahoma

Kansas State

Florida

Virginia Tech

Michigan

Game-by-game x-box scores will come on a weekly basis as the season goes on.

Up Next... Miami of Ohio Preview

GO BLUE!

 

Awaiting the Autumnal Equinox

Oh Those Summer Nights

The shenanigans were few and far between this summer, popping up only on the weekends. No notable crazy trips, no cavorting about with any famous people, and no all-nighters with work in the morning. The age of the Ann Arbor fantasy campers may have reared its ugly head.

But then came the houseboat trip. I kept the hype at bay. No pre-boat polls, no survivor. In fact, many of you that are reading this are just finding out that there was such a trip. This is mostly attributed to the lack of known tailgaters and website regulars on the boat, as there were really only two of us. In addition, the level of craziness to come was certainly in question, as a host of unknowns made the trek to Jamestown, Kentucky... leaving real lives and real jobs, a stark contrast to the level of unreality that preceded the boat trip of 2001.

And then we met, and the alcohol began to flow, the music began to play, and State Dock turned over the 81 ft monstrosity to 18 people, mostly strangers to each other, but not strangers to the vices that would eventually bring them together. Cheap beer and Vodka-Red Bulls flowed freely as we pulled into the "falls" tying off with several other house boats, creating a floating city of sin.

Hot-tubbing, tube-sliding, general lake-floating, tanning, and even a few rounds of no-limit hold-em became the pastimes of the group. The weekend culminated with a private lake cove and a bonfire, and in the end a lot of sad goodbyes. It was a pleasure to spend this binge-drinking weekend with each of these great people that I am happy to now call friends, and you can bet we will be doing it again.

The Season Approaches

Are you ready? The countdown continues leading up to the 125th season of Michigan football. Michigan has an opportunity to become the winningest program in college football with a victory at Notre Dame on September 11, further solidifying Michigan football as the greatest program of all time. In addition, the nation's top receiving core will welcome the addition of Matt Gutierrez (as opposed to dealing with the "loss" of John Navarre), who has never lost a game in which he was the starting QB...although he's never started a college game. David Underwood will fill the shoes of Chris Perry. Marlin Jackson returns to his natural position at cornerback, and Steve Breaston will try to continue to be the most exciting player in college football returning punts and kickoffs. It seems we have all the answers. It seems we have all of the puzzle pieces. But with a schedule that ranks at the top of the nation in degree of difficulty, and tough road games at ND, Purdue, and Ohio State, the slip-up opportunities are there. What legacy will Braylon Edwards and Marlin Jackson leave behind? Only time will tell.

But the X-Box will tell first. The season preview will be up on Monday. See you all in about 2 weeks.