There's A Way to Fix All of This

​I watched a mashup of Michigan highlights against Ohio State on YouTube yesterday.  The video quality was really poor.  I thought about how somebody should remix the videos in HD to make it more pleasing to the eye.  Then I realized that the videos were so bad because there hasn't been a highlight of a Michigan-Ohio State game that Michigan has won that was shot in HD.  That's how long it's been.  Incoming freshman at the University of Michigan were in 7th grade the last time Michigan beat Ohio State.  I might as well have been watching UCLA basketball videos from the 70's. That's the sad truth about this rivalry.  There isn't one.  God I want that back.

This ain't easy.  A hole has been dug, and no matter how much we lack in talent, and despite this being only the second year of our Coach's tenure, everybody...and I mean everybody, is pointing fingers and looking for answers from this staff.  Things are beginning to compound.  The buyout, practice-gate, the worst defense ever to take the field, and the losses...my god the losses.  Momentum is building against Rich Rodriguez.  Even if you believe, as I do, that this was the right choice, that Coach Rodriguez is the man for this job and will take us to new heights, you can't be certain how long we can hold off the barbarians at the gate.

Of all the Michigan traditions that we hold so dear, winning is the only one that really means anything.  You can cover the scoreboard with advertisements, pipe in rap music, and have the team wear gold jerseys as they run out of smoke filled tunnel to the sound of cannon fire...if at the end of the game, Michigan has more points than their opponent, you won't give a shit.  You won't spend a week talking about whether Rich Rodriguez understands the rivalry with Ohio State.  I mean, seriously, do you expect him to?  He's from West Virginia.  Why would he understand our unique situation, our 100+ years of epic battles, and the hatred that goes along with it?  How can I expect him to have the understanding that even I have?  I saw Charles Woodson fight David Boston, he saw it on Sportscenter because he WAS COACHING ANOTHER TEAM.  I understand the rivalry because I've had things thrown at me in Columbus.  I've endured the wrath of angry Buckeyes whose lack of brains can only be matched by their lack of teeth, managing to slur out a "fuck you" as I made my way to the stadium.  How did understanding this rivalry become a requirement for being a Michigan coach?  I'll tell you what, Stan Parrish understands this rivalry.  And I sure as hell don't want him pacing my sideline.  A better example...Nick Saban knew absolutlely nothing about Auburn vs. Alabama when he took over for the Crimson Tide.  He probably still doesn't, because he's already worrying about winning national championships, not about the Tigers.

But, whatever, it's really all moot.  We are seemingly on the brink of disaster, even though we shouldn't be.  Patience doesn't seem to exist here.  Ohio State is not a must win, but it is a MUST COMPETE.  If we get blown out, they will be waiting with pitchforks at Schembechler Hall.  And the thing is, we've been blownout by lesser teams already, which makes an impossible situation even more, well, impossible.  I'm having a lot of trouble coming to grips with the fact that I think they are going to do it.  I didn't think we were that dumb as a fanbase.  Hell, Jaime Morris even made up with Jim Harbaugh this week.  Cats and dogs living together.  Mass hysteria.  We are on the doorstep of the Michigan apocalypse.

And imagine being Rich Rodriguez.  How much more of this do you really want?  The roller coaster of love-hate-love-hate-reallyreallyhate has got to be taking its toll.  And now you are faced with a group of players, some of which that because of outside influences and previous regime loving parents don't even believe in you or your system, and you have to look at them and motivate them, and you have to ask them for all intents and purposes, to save your face, to save your job.  It's too early for this people....just too early.

One game.  One game against the most talented team you've faced all season.  One game for all the marbles.

Those that say Michigan has nothing to play for on Saturday couldn't be more wrong.  Those that say this year's edition of The Game doesn't have the panache of previous seasons don't understand what is happening here in Ann Arbor.  When it's all said and done, this game may be the single most important Michigan-Ohio State game ever played.

With one miracle, one upset, everything can change.

And yes, I do believe in miracles.

GO BLUE!  BEAT THE BUCKEYES!

Like a Moth to A Flame, I Am Attracted to #13's Blog

​There's no hiding my extreme fandom for the greatest Ohio State running back in history.  Immediately you are thinking...OMG, a Michigan fan likes Archie Griffin?  Nope.  I have nothing but disdain for him and his two Heismans.  So, Eddie George?  Ha.  Don't think so.  I'll see your 104 yards and raise you Biakabutuka's 313.  My fav...Maurice Clarrett.  He won the Buckeyes the 2002 National Championship, challenged the NFL's rules to try to enter the draft after his Freshman year, gave a revealing interview about the inner workings of Ohio State athletics, and he is decidedly pro-Israel.  Unfortunately for Mo, Israel was not exactly pro-Clarrett, and that is what took him from us in 2006, out of the public eye, and into Toledo Correctional, where he'll be eligible for release in 2014.

I have often wondered how I, as a person so drawn to the life and times of Mo-C, was going to be able to get by until then.  I sometimes find myself sitting in my family room, bottle of Grey Goose nearby, whacking my coffee table with a hatchet, pondering my own existence while wondering what Mo is thinking or doing at that exact moment.  Has he made the other inmates his bitch?  Or has he succumbed to the sisters for in house protection, an extra squirt of toothpaste, and a poster of Lil' Kim.  He is just a 40 minute drive down US23 from The Big House, at a real life big house, and yet I know nothing about his daily activities.  With bunk beds, he and his cellmate must BE ABLE TO DO SO MANY ACTIVITIES!

And then it happened.

Could it be?  Could this be real?  Maurice Clarrett...blogging about life in the clink and offering up daily affirmations?!?!?!?  It can't be real.  It just can't.  The good Lord couldn't possibly want to bestow such a blessing upon me as a Michigan Clarrett fan.  I am not worthy.  He's letting us all inside The Mind of Maurice Clarrett (HT:Deadspin), and I couldn't be happier.

To be honest, if it does get proven fake...I'm still pretending it's real, just to get by.

I Really Hate Ohio

​If you want your blood to boil, chew on this post from the land of sibling marriage...

Three years ago, they were 11-0 and ranked #2 in the nation.  The words National Championship were being used in their vocabulary....

...Since that #2 ranking, they have lost to the Buckeyes 3 times, their HOME record is 7-8, and they have suffered defeat to a lower division school and a MAC school.


And that's just the Wolverine portion of the argument.  Stabs are also taken at the Pistons, Lions, and Tigers in the name of the great cesspool of Cleveland.  Cleveland, I must mention, has not won a major sports championship since 1964.  Ohio State, the Buffalo Bills of college athletics, haven't won a National Championship since 2002...and did so then using a player that was most certainly ineligible and that later brandished an AK-47 during a police chase.  Ya, the last 4 years or so, they have been the unquestionable leaders of Big Ten Football.  They prevailed...in the worst years of Big Ten Football.  Winning 5 straight Big Ten titles in the late 80's and early 90's is a little more impressive than dominating a struggling conference in the 2000's.  Yes, I'm clinging to the past with a blind eye to the current situation.  Michigan fans always talk history, etc, etc.  Whatever.  We still own you.  57-42-6.  We will continue to own you while the Indians cling to mythical prominence from the movie Major League, the Browns cling to records that belong to the Baltimore Ravens, and the Cavs prepare for the free agency exodus of LeBron James.  Bailout?  Cleveland already got their bailout years ago, and it's still a steaming pile of shit with a horribly misplaced museum, and a hot spot called "the flats" that is about as impressive as the Cass Corridor.

The End is What Will Matter

​These first half deficits are getting a little tedious.

These last two weeks have been horrible.

This Ohio State dominance in the two "money" sports has gone beyond pissing me off...now it's just, well...it just sucks.

There's a kind of "we've been figured out" feeling floating around, a feeling that goes back to the Big Ten opening spanking we took at the hands of the Badgers.  Not that the system we're running is futile, but is less than optimal with the horses we have in the race.  This coupled with our pre-Big Ten "superstars" often becoming mere mortals in the face of conference competition has given us the poor results we are enduring.  Results that seem more like the norm than beating Duke or UCLA.

But you can't take away the strides we've made.  You can't discard those victories.  Those are team builders.  And under Coach Beilein, maybe they can find a new way to get things on track.  Because if you start hot, and you end hot, no one will remember that you stumbled in the middle.

Nearly all of the big conference games are in front of us.  I hope, at the least, that it's an interesting ride.

Thank You Tulsa...and Some Quick Hits

To my competitors in the Bowl Pool...  Stan Parrish?  Really?  Realllllllly?

For the past two weeks, Brady Hoke has been packing his bags and making daily 5pm dinner plans at Rams Horn with a geriatric Steve Fisher, leaving Stan the man to lead the Cardinals into postseason play for the first time since, well, ever.  So, ya, I took Tulsa, and ya, I clinched the pool regardless of championship game outcome.

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Ohio State kept the momentum going on the basketball court, losing 67-58.  Unfortunately, it came at the hands of Sparty.  So in short, the desired outcome, a release of copius amounts of sarin gas into the Breslin Center, did not occur.

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Scot Loeffler, who is still too cool for that second "t," has been named the QB coach of the Florida Gators.  If this whole Rich Rod thing doesn't work out, we'll give you a coordinator spot on Harbaugh's staff.

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Rosters for the Shine Game on January 17th have been set, TT is on the East, along with Morgan Trent. Look for draft stock to rise on the 3 QBs on the West Roster.

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BIG GAME TONIGHT.  Michigan looks to end a 13-year drought in Assembly Hall in Zack Novak's homecoming.  LIVE 6:30pm, BTN.