We Now Return to Our Regularly Scheduled Mediocrity

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To say it was an improvement would be an understatement, as all football...everywhere...and at any time past or present is an improvement over what made its way out on to the field the previous two weeks.   However, to say it was good would be a gratuitous overstatement.  

A couple of team moves seemed to work, as a reshuffled offensive line seemed to be slightly more effective, and Devin Funchess has obviously found a home at the receiver position.  Gardner was great at handoffs, and the addition of Funchess allowed his eyes to unlock from the Desmond Howard's legends jersey that he'd been burning a hole in since last November.  He also didn't make many good throws.  From my vantage point, he was bailed out by Funchess two or three times on balls that could have or should have been picked.  There was a lot of Henne-to-Braylon-style (later perfected by Denard) underthrows where our guy came back for the ball quicker than the Gopher D could react to a shitty pass...resulting in long, undeserved (but appreciated!) completions.  We couldn't seem to come up with that kill shot, either in the form of a score to put it out of reach, or a sustained drive to run out the clock.  Make no mistake, the game was not put away until very late, despite what seemed like 100 chances to do so.  Defensively we were just ok, not dominating.  Mobile quarterbacks, even when not that mobile, still cause problems here...and I got news for you, they always will.  We also seem to be susceptible to long passes, or several consecutive medium range ones.  I feel like they come in spurts...like entire drives where someone is wide open on every throw.  But in defense of the defense, we seem to make just enough timely stops to stall drives and/or force field goals.

Anyway, it was a decent win against a team that is not good and that was without their coach who IMHO needs to change his career...or at least his role.  In getting to East Lansing undefeated news, Penn State just lost to Indiana by 20, so either that's great because they suck or that's bad because they're going to be pissed this weekend.  Then Indiana visits (Tailgate Theme Alert:  White Trash) and, um, did I mention they just beat Penn State by 20?

Bottom line, this level of play probably gets us by Penn State, Indiana, and maybe Iowa.  We need to play better than this to get by MSU, NW, Nebraska, and OSU.  Reverting to Akron or UCONN play levels will result in a loss regardless of how hapless the opponent will be.

See y'all in Happy Valley.  Go Blue!


Theme Revealed: 10/5/13 Minnesota Homecoming


A picture of your's truly was once featured on the website CamelToe.org, an organization dedicated to capturing and cataloging photos of ladies' crotch-creases, for posing in front of a mammoth Goldy the Gopher blow up prior to a Michigan victory in the Metrodome.  He/she had the biggest cameltoe ever seen, though it was debatable whether or not he/she had on any pants.  That's the picture I wanted to put up, but I couldn't find it in time, so I put this picture of a hungover Godfather about squeeze his belly into Al's Breakfast in Minneapolis's Dinkytown for piles of hash and blueberry pancakes.

Three fun facts:  1) Michigan won all the games they played in that Metrodome.  2) We were almost arrested for eating peanuts and leaning on a food service staging area in the concourse.  3) They served beer at the Metrodome...and not in the crappy hunt-for-it style of their current venue.  It was there.  In the open.  And it was delicious.

But this is not about the Metrodome, it's about coming home to the Big House.  It's Homecoming.  Tuba will be here.  There will be dances, fundraisers, formal dinners...the bars will be hopping on Friday night.  And at the tailgate?  Well...

10/5/13 Minnesota
Kickoff:  3:30pm
Theme:  Carnival

I can't wait for Mrs. Cleveland to see this.  I didn't even ask her.  Games!  Games!  Games!  Pin the tail on the Tressell, an autographs for tattoos booth, a makeout with the Godfather booth, and a nice game of "where in the world (read: on/in their bodies) did Dennis and Adam hide their Boone's Farm bottles?".  I also want a cotton candy machine and a slurpee maker.  Somebody get on that.

Pancake breakfast will be served, though there will likely be some bacon in the batter, and maybe even some corn meal....so make that Bacon-laced Johnny Cakes for breakfast.  Cheesesteaks / Pizzasteaks return for lunch.  And elephant ears will be a nice pre-game snack.  Attire?  Everyone should wear clown shoes.