Nice and Easy

​I was pissed when we scheduled Delaware State.  Of course I know that these things are beyond our control, and that we did our due diligence to get an FBS opponent, but there's something slightly embarrassing about scheduling a game like this.  It's diffiult to explain to the not-so-football-savvy co-worker, to outline the complexities of the politics and the apprehension of any BCS participating school to give a home game away without getting a return game in the future.  I guess the simple answer is that this, like most things, is about money.  We've already got our big non-conference home-at-home in the Notre Dame series, and it's just not fiscally sound to add another in this era where football covers the cost of the non-revenue (read: chick) sports.  We used to do it.  We used to travel west every few years to face a Pac-10 opponent.  We also used to lose that game pretty much every time, so there's that.

In retrospect however, I think the Delaware State game was spectacular, and a wonderful idea.  Ignoring the once in a millennium chance of the unthinkable happening, I can only find positives in the scheduling of a team that would have been better served playing the night before at Hollway Field...

The bulk of the regular starters got a full week of practice, a full week of learning more of The System, and then got to run a few series before giving way to the second and third team.  Minor got another week to quell his nagging injuries, and Brown and Forcier were able to reorganize their marbles.

New names and faces found their way into the record book, which is good both for experience and for team morale.  Nothing brings a team together more than cheering for their own, for guys that haven't seen the field, and may have never had the chance if it weren't for a game like this.  For lack of a better reference, it's like Rudy, but without the blatant no call on the offsides penalty.

Stat-tastic.  Michigan racked up a program record 727 yards on Saturday.  And while this means little with regards to this team's chances in their remaining 5 Big Ten contests, it is, in fact, historic.  Should we be boasting about racking up 700+ against Delaware State?  No.  But in the annals of Michigan history, Delaware State is not the worst team we have ever taken the field against...so it means something, albeit a little something.  I mean, in 1905 we played Albion and won 70-0.  In 1892 we played the Michigan Athletic club twice in 4 days, outscoring them by a total of 142-0 in an October in which Michigan played 7 games in 21 days.  But the powers that be say that 727 is a record, so it's a record.  Mark it down.  You were there.  Michigan also had 461 yards on the ground, bumping them up to #8 in the nation in rushing.  More importantly for the game promoting talking heads, the yards amassed on Saturday moved Michigan into the #2 slot in total offense in the Big Ten...#1 is Penn State, so, like, take the over.  Michigan is also #9 in the nation in scoring after putting up 63 points.  Michigan hasn't racked up that many since 1992, when they demolished Minnesota 63-13.

The Delaware State game also allowed for some new faces to make their way into the stands.  Average Joe was able to get cheap (or free) tickets and see the Big House, which is a good thing in these economic times, and is good for a growing Michigan fanbase.  Not to mention that we tailgated like the Buckeyes were on the schedule, not the Hornets.  The turnout was ridiculous for a game of this type, and there was enough food to stuff the lot of them, further showing that the gameday experience is much more than what happens on the field.

Saturday was exactly what I hoped it would be, a bye week in uniforms.  But in the end, from many aspects, it was so much more.  Five games remain, and none of them are going to be easy.  This year's Wolverines, as much as we would like them to be defined by their 5-2 record and their marked improvement over last year, will instead be defined by these final five contests.  Will they grow enough to avoid making Freshman mistakes?  Will they play well enough to overcome those mistakes if they happen?  Hell if I know...I'm just happy to be along for the ride.

Oh, and Ohio State lost to Purdue.  Which is funny.  So laugh at them, and I'll see you next week for the Old School tailgate, which is our second theme this season named after the title of a Will Ferrell movie.

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....We're Halfway There

If you don't love Bon Jovi...you don't love yourself. And if you don't love Mike Hart, tell me where to meet you for your well-deserved ass kicking.

On a day that felt often felt Appstateish (a word soon to be added to Webster's) 

Mike Hart became the all-time leading rusher in Michigan history, solidifying his place among the all-time greats to wear the winged helmet. And despite a body, speed, and skill set that is likely not made for the next level, you should know that Mike Hart will be a beacon for the University of Michigan regardless of what kind of career he has in the NFL. He is the face of this team. He is the voice of this team. And I'm not just talking about this year, I'm speaking (typing) in much broader terms. Mike says all the right things, but more importantly, he means everything he says. He believes in this program more than you do. It's unfortunate that this team and this coaching staff can't get him what he so aptly deserves: a National Championship, a Heisman trophy, and the proverbial ride off into the sunset. But the funny thing is, he could care less at this point. He is content in single handedly keeping this team together, keeping this team winning. As far as Michigan Men go...Mike Hart is Maize and Blue perfection. Undersized and underestimated, a will and a determination that cannot be measured, a true believer in "the team, the team, the team." He is in a nutshell the athletic embodiment of Bo himself.

Congratulations Mike.

So, we're 4-2 after six games, the halfway point of the 2007 regular season campaign. Unfortunately, out of those 6 games, we have only managed to play well once, and that was against the worst team ever. Despite the smoke and mirrors of winning four straight, we have not recovered from the two early season losses. We still come out stagnant week after week, needing a second-half, and sometimes 4th quarter wake-up call to win games against inferior teams. We still play down to the opponent.

What looked like mid-October garbage games coming into the season are now huge. A ranked Purdue team on homecoming and a road trip to Champaign to play an upstart Illinois team that runs a spread. Follow that up with what will be (one way or another) a November to remember. What I'm getting at is that the season hasn't even started yet. And that's good, because we haven't really started playing yet.

The Urban-themed tailgate went off without a hitch. There wasn't a whole lot of Urban flair to it, but we weren't short on food. Country style breakfast, sweet potato pie, cinnamon rolls, black-eyed pea stew, and pulled pork were just some of the delicious delights that adorned the tailgate tables. Noticeably absent: cheesy potatoes...and the Godfather. Captain Michigan was forced into the leadership role once again, and with his poignant and speedy announcements, his ignoring of the newcomers to the tailgate, and his amazing move to gather us together for a group picture, he showed once again why he is not just an alcoholic crazy man...but a leader of alcoholic crazy men (and women).

Battle for 17 while we drink 40s

by Johnny Cleveland

In a season with a set of continually descending goals, we have an opportunity to capture our first title. Kings of the County. The Wolverines enter Saturday tied for first place in the Big Ten standings with Illinois, Wisconsin and OSU. The Hurons Eagles travel a short 7 miles down Washtenaw Ave. with a .500 mark in the MAC West and an overall record of 2-3. Continue Reading for the tail of the tape and lots of fun linkages!



Last Meeting55-0 Us, Sept. 17, 2005. Series: UM 7-0

EnrollmentEMU (23,000) UM (38,006)

Coaches: EMU (Genyk, 4th year) UM (Carr, last year) *1


  1. Apparently LC coached at EMU as an assistant in the 70's!!


Discipline Issues:


Players:


OTHER NOTES and Distractions till the Urban starts @ 8 AM.


  1. Say hello to an old friend named Bob

  2. At least we are all still alive to play football Saturday

  3. Tickets less than face?

  4. Time to Laugh!

Captain Michigan Scores More Than Michigan State

​The preseason Heisman candidate and his band of preseason Big Ten Champion darkhorses came into Ann Arbor on Saturday. They were bruised, battered, and coming off two of the most embarrassing back-to-back losses in their history. They had absolutely nothing to lose, and could begin to salvage a disastrous season by handing their "rival" their first loss. Winning fixes everything. Unfortunately for the Spartan faithful, the Green and White seem to only know how to disappoint

Unlike the past two years, it wouldn't take overtime. The loudest cheers came during announcements of the score from the  Detroit Tigers dismantling of the Yankee dynasty just 35 miles away in Comerica Park, and it was the only cheering the Michigan State faithful would feel compelled to participate in. In fact, this game was less in question by the end of the first half than Michigan's games against Vanderbilt and Central Michigan. Michigan dominated, broadcasting their weekly edition of "Establishing the Run", racking up 211 yards on 5 yards per carry. 122 yards of the ground attack came from Mike Hart, 51 from Kevin Grady, and 39 from true frosh Brandon Minor, who broke a 40-yard TD run to seal the game late in the 3rd quarter. Henne-to-Arrington showed up again with a spectacular leaping grab of 13 yards for the first touchdown of the game. Henne-to-Manningham, now a household name, came through again with 2 touchdowns of 41 and 27 yards. A late 2-yard touchdown by a scrambling Stanton somehow warranted his own personal celebration, but it would not be enough in his final chance to beat the Maize and Blue. Michigan wins 31-13...and it has never been less exciting. On it's way to being only termed a rivalry because of geography, Michigan-Michigan St. not only didn't warrant a Maize Out, it barely deserved your attention.

So we quickly move on to next week. Michigan has earned themselves half of a perfect season, the first since 1997, and that means that things are starting to get serious in Ann Arbor. They have two solid contests in the next two weeks before three weeks of patsies on the road to Columbus. First is what many are calling a "trap game" under the lights in Beaver Stadium, where the visiting Wolverines will come in ranked #4 for the first time since...you guessed it...1997.

The tailgate was completely ridiculous, full of first-timers, and overrun with a level of drunkenness and debauchery not previously observed. Exhaustion even had me down for the count. Perhaps the masses were not quite prepared for the longest home tailgate in UMTailgate.com history, as many stumbled in late to the battle for the Paul Bunyan trophy, and some didn't make it at all. But in the end, it didn't matter. Get drunk, pass out...forget about it...with Michigan State, you can relax.

Slaphappy Staff Predictions for Michigan Agricultural College

​The Hammer:

This week has proven to be the toughest for me by far. This is vintage Michigan State, acting the fool just to make a possible upset bid all the more disgraceful to our school. Typical MSU, NOT typical Michigan. This is game one of the long road to the promise land my friends. Matt Trannon might have more completed passes than Drew Stanton this week. I'll give them 10 just because...but that's being generous. The only motivation Michigan ever needs should be proving that "last week" was no fluke. Validating each win with another win. Catch my drift?! Getting better every week. We go into week 6 needing to validate our 5-0 record and we'll go into week 7 needing to validate 6-0.

Michigan 31
East Lansing 10
(wait till you see the enthusiasm of their fans when they take a 7-0 lead, only to get three the rest of the way)

DMVP - Shawn Crable
OMVP - Mike Hart

Johnny Cleveland not available (drunk) at press time.

XBox Says:

Michigan 28
Michigan State 13

The Webmaster:

I'm with the Hammer in that this has got "bullshit call gives Sparty victory" or "broken play gives Sparty victory" written all over it. So we cannot afford to keep them in our rear view mirror. They must be buried. And after Lamarr removes torso from legs, you can get your shovels out. Michigan will win, cover, and unfortunately end the Michigan State career of John L. Smith. We will miss you John L...you crazy bastard.

Michigan 27
Michigan State 6