Weekend Roundup: Ranked Above USC Edition 10/29/07

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​It's an amazing thing, this college football. An entire sport, an entire system, predicated on the way you finish, not the way you start. And so goes 2007. Michigan #12 BCS, USC #19 BCS. Who would've thought that after App State and Oregon that Michigan was on the road to the Rose Bowl (maybe Citrus?), while USC would be thinking about a trip to San Diego for the Holiday Bowl. Like I said though, it's how you finish, and we're not finished yet...not by a long shot.

As for the Big Ten Championship, Michigan can still lose one of their next two and find themselves playing for it on Nov 17th. Everyone else has at least 2 Big Ten losses. First tiebreaker is the head-to-head matchup, and fortunately not who lost to a 1AA team. Yessir...all the marbles.

What you missed this weekend while planning your time behind bars:

The Future is Now

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​The 89th battle for the Little Brown Jug went to the Wolverines on Saturday, 34-10. Once again, fans were treated to a tale of two halves. A first half of fear and loathing, and a second half of proper adjustments, inspired defense, and taking advantage of the opponent's weaknesses. If I had a nickel for every time my section 30 cohort Kevin mentioned that there was a midget in single coverage on Manningham, I'd have enough to replace the EZ-Up tent that fell victim to the whipping wind during the tailgate. Note to self..always use stakes. Live and learn, folks, live and learn. Seems that is the theme for this edition of the Wolverines. The solomidgetcoverage on Manningham in the first half usually precluded a hand-off to Minor or Brown. In the second half, it resulted in laser guided Mallet-bombs for large gains...and still some hand-offs to Minor and Brown, ya know, to keep 'em honest.

Hart, no Henne. Henne, no Hart. No Henne or Hart. This is the reality of what has so far been an rags to riches comeback. We've done it...and we've done it with part or all of next year's team. And while I've really appreciated the experience and chemistry we've gained for the future, I think I'd like to have 2007's team play out the rest of this season. No, really, the resting of Henne and Hart was a nice gesture, but I think I'd like to see them dressed from here on out. Lloyd seemed to hint that they will both be back for the Backyard Brawl on replay...so, nice.

Three games. Two tough road tests, and one for all the marbles.

Death, taxes, and cold and rainy days for soups and stews...all certainties it seems. A surprisingly open Ann Arbor Golf and Outing was host to an amazing array of warm concoctions from a bevy of tailgaters. Bacon and dumpling, vegetable, stuffed pepper, broccoli cheese...and so many others. On site grilled cheese sandwiches made their first tailgate appearance for dipping and munching. Considering the weather, it was an amazing turnout.

For those that may not have heard, UMTailgate.com was featured on the front page of The Ann Arbor News on Friday. The article followed the "battle" between UMTailgate and Garsworld, and thanks go out to Jo Mathis for doing it. Thanks also to Gar for inferring that UMTailgate.com is X-Rated and full of strippers, while his tailgate is family oriented. The online version of the article has a youtube video featuring yours truly bashing Gar and his little world. Wow, the Orlando Sentinel and the Ann Arbor News in one season. Worldwide baby, worldwide.

Congratulations go out to Goody, son of the Captain, and nephew of the Godfather, on his engagement. No jokes just yet. Whew...this is the toughest thing I've ever done. Not sure how long I can hold out.

Weekend Roundup: 4-To-Go Edition: 10/23/2007

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​Sometimes you have to stop and look at the big picture, right? The Wolverines have won six straight. There are four games to go. Win those four games, and there is only one team that can talk shit to you about App State....and that's Oregon. Hell, you might even get the chance to rematch those Ducks in the Rose Bowl and fix it all. Interesting scenarios abound...but at the center of it all? Winning the four games. Brown Jug. At Sparty. At Wisconsin. Buckeyes. A partial recovery from the worst start in the history of college football...so much more to go.

Is it really a weekend roundup when you don't do it until Tuesday night? Oh well, here's what you missed while you pondered who will play Sloth in the most anticipated sequel ever.

What Do You Do When You Lost to the Team That Lost to Appalachian State?

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​I've never been shy in voicing my displeasure with the gameday experience at some of the hallowed Big Ten venues across the midwest. Ross-Ade stadium in West Lafayette has been the butt of many a joke over the years, and truly is a horrible place to travel to from an away fan's perspective. Previous diatribes can be seen here and here. But on another unseasonably warm fall Saturday (damn you Al Gore) Memorial Stadium made a run as worst spot on the Big Ten map. They encompass all aspects of stadium crappiness. Limited seating due to construction....check. Piped in music including such cliched wonders as "For Whom the Bell Tolls"...check. Poorly managed volume control on said music...check. Playing the music until moments before the snap...check. PA announcer that announces first downs for the home team as if gaining ten yards in akin to curing cancer...check. Asshole fans with an unwarranted chip on their shoulders...check. Fans talking shit to their opponent even though it's been 24 years since you defeated them in your own stadium...check. Having to turn your body to see the game action due to poorly designed seating angles...check. And as if that weren't enough, ticket misprints and confusing temporary section numbers led to me not getting to my seat until the 8 minute mark of the 1st quarter, though I arrived at the stadium 20 minutes before kickoff. Well done Champaign. Well done. I'm beginning to believe they didn't take away the Chief because of the inappropriate nature of the practice, but because he couldn't find his way in to your pathetic relic of a football stadium.

So there, I said it. Memorial Stadium = 50,000 Courics.

From a "game itself" perspective, I would like to thank the Illini for the timely penalties, turnovers, and sloppy play that allowed us to overcome having no Mike Hart, half of a Chad Henne, and our own pile of dumb mistakes to come out victorious once again. The 27-17 victory, though not satisfying from the "we played well" angle, was enough for me to smile and laugh at the group of Illini fans that started the game with an "Appalachian State" chant, and was enough to stick it a bit to Ronnie Zook. Zook, though he was fired from the University of Florida, still voted for them to go to the National Championship game last year over Michigan, and was the only Big Ten coach to do so. Dick. Screw you and your illegal recruits. Also, now watching the replay of the game from the ABC broadcast, it's also satisfying from the "I hate Musburger" perspective. His anti-Michigan demeanor makes me like Kirk Herbstreit...and Herbstreit is a Buckeye-loving assclown.

Summing up: Zook=dick, Musberger=with the terrorists, Herbstreit=fruit

A 7pm tailgate is a lot like giving birth. Three full meals. 12 hours of drinking. Cooking, loading, unloading, picture taking, smelling Gar, feeding Cooper....it's all so tiring. But it's worth it, especially when you are riding in and partying with a 40 foot home on wheels. Once again, UMTailgate.com flexed its tailgating muscle with a sophisticated menu, an array of cocktails and beer, and the best damn fans in the Big Ten. God we're good. Thanks to the rest of the five man traveling team for coming along and at no point saying "you brought too much stuff," even though I brought way too much stuff. Hope we can do it again next year. Happy Valley???