Madison Wins Again

​They get us every time. No, not on the football field, where the Badgers 37-21 victory managed to increase their win-loss record to just 12-48 all time against us (and just their 5-21 at home). It's in the war on the streets. It's in the bars, the pubs, and the restaurants that Madison manages to outshine the rest of the Big Ten. Make no mistake, they will out drink you, they will out eat you, they will out party you. And they don't care if they win or lose, or if there is even a game.

You may find yourself posing as an extra in a reality version of Beerfest, neck deep in a liter mug of authentic German swill at the Essen Haus, thinking that no one is possibly having more than one. But when you order your second, someone from Madison has just guzzled their fifth to chase three bratwurst and a brick of cheese. Those liter mugs...the dishwashers can't get them clean fast enough. On the night we arrived, they were out of "the boots", which hold what I would estimate as twice as much as the liter mug.

You may also find yourself exploring the scene that is State Street. Nothing like the Ann Arbor version, Madison's State Street is more akin to Bourbon Street. I can only imagine what goes on when the weather is warm. But based on the outfits of your average coed, which were just north (or south, depending on where your standing) of naked...my imagination doesn't have much room to move around. They must hand out skirts at orientation...and neglect to warn people of the dangers of frostbite. There are lines at every establishment, and they appear long. However, the speed of the lines is uncanny, most likely due to the fact that there is amazing turnover of customers going to other bars. The options are nearly endless. You are only limited by your imbibing abilities. And no matter how well you think you handle the bottle...you are not ready to go toe-to-toe with these people.

Once you have filled yourself to the brim with cocktails, you may long for a little something to soak it up. In comes the street carts. They are everywhere, and there is a variety of cuisine, from Afgan Mediterranean to fried chicken and fish. It looks as if a street fair moved in to town. So many carts, all with lines, turning out food from midnight to 3am, and probably doing enough business on Friday and Saturday nights to make a living. Actually, though I've never spent a Sunday through Thursday in Madison, I doubt that it is all that scaled down...they probably do well every night.

The real evidence that drinking is the number one varsity sport at Wisconsin? It's the student attendance at the other varsity sport, football. With 11 minutes to go in the first quarter, about 50% of the student section sat empty. And while you may think they were all weak and nursing hangovers, the truth is that they were still drinking from the night before. Friday night bar hopping rolled over into early morning tailgating, and (gasp!) an 11am local kickoff. Nice.

Also inexplicably absent from the game...the Michigan Wolverines. Whether it was looking ahead, missing Mike and Chad, or a general lack of care about a game that meant little with regards to post season aspirations...it was a loss. And while it is disappointing that we are not going to be a recovery story for the ages, there is still peace of mind available to us next Saturday. In a year marred by the worst loss ever, that's going to have to be enough.

The Tailgate...nice and quick and simple. Having been discouraged by the "alcohol free zone" at our usual Madison site, we managed to find ourselves a new tailgate spot due to some cunning undercover work at the Essen Haus. The beanbag game made a road appearance as we filled up on kitchen sink breakfast burritos with sour cream and salsa, cheesy potatoes, brownies...and beer.

The Weekend Roundup: To the VICTORS Go the Spoils Edition: 11/6/2007

​Much has been made of the "war of words" between Mike Hart and Mark Dantonio. For the second time this season, a coach has responded to comments made by Mike Hart. Isn't that embarrassing for the coach? I mean, what kind of headway can you make as a leader of men when you are bantering back and forth with a student-athlete in a "I know you are but what am I?" fashion. Perhaps there's a case to be made that Mike needs to grow up. Fortunately for him, he's young and literally needs to grow up. As for Harbaugh and Dantonio...they ARE grown up, and they are acting like a couple of bitches more interested in winning a conversation with a 22 year old than winning football games. The Spartans and Cardinal(s) are basically lucky to get the national attention they are getting from Mike shitting on them. Get that fellas? Mike poops, and the location of his poop becomes news. You sirs, you are just toilets. Shut up and win.

Of course, this topic has been run through the ringer in the blogosphere. I will direct you to the post by MGoBlog, which continues my streak of linking to MGoBlog pretty much every time I write a post. He has a good take on it, and also links to the rest of the good takes across said blogosphere. (Spartans, Your Profession is Loser - MGoBlog):

But seriously folks, the one thing the Michigan State program needed was a monomaniacal focus on Michigan. It needed a coach who would install a countdown clock to their eighth straight loss in the series. It needed a man who would stand up and say "you know what, guys? All those other games we play are stupid and we shouldn't try very hard in them." It needed a guy who would teach his resilient troops to follow his example by bitching to the assembled media a full two days after his team blew it again. It needed a man who could forge them into a cohesive unit capable of picking up critical personal fouls at the very worst time possible. See, the problem with Michigan State is that occasionally they enter the fourth quarter of games leading. And Michigan State needs a man who can blow that lead, preferably in really, really painful fashion.

Friends, Mark Dantonio is that man.


I dream of writing shit like that. Damn you mgoblog! Other takes on Hart vs. Dantonio to look at when you are not on a quest to find every abandoned Chi-Chi's in the nation

The rest of the news around the internets that you missed while building your ownCharlie Weiss Jabba the Hut.

That Sound You Hear is Mike Hart Laughing

It will be posted on their lockers for the next five years. It will make their blood boil. It will be a rallying cry. It will continue the perception that Michigan is arrogant. I couldn't care less. What is it? It's Mike Hart's postgame quote:

I was just laughing," Hart said of Michigan State taking the lead. "I thought it was funny. They got excited. Sometimes you get your little brother excited when you're playing basketball, and you let him get the lead, and then you come back and take it back."

You hear that Sparty? Mike Hart is laughing at you. He called you a 'little brother.' And there's nothing you can do about it until October 25, 2008. In fact, you can't even exact revenge on him. He'll be playing in the NFL and reminiscing about how he never lost to you in four starts and busted you for 100+ in each game.

There is a place here somewhere for humility, or perhaps charity. You know...you just may want to feel bad for Sparty Nation. A loss Friday evening in basketball to Grand Valley State University and the finest choke job of the college football weekend against their perceived rival.

The night began with a pep rally for the Michigan State football team on the eve of its matchup with archrival Michigan. Coach Mark Dantonio and co-captain Travis Key spoke to the sellout crowd before the coaches and players formed a tunnel to welcome the basketball team.

Whoops. That's rough. But before you start feeling sympathetic towards lil bro, know that they were ready to flaunt the product of their inferiority complex if they had won. So ready were they to smack talk that they started to get lippy with 7:40 to go in the game. Up by ten and in the wake of (to that point) a dominating 2nd half on the ground, they had something they only seem to find in the Breslin Center...confidence. It must have felt good to have us on the ropes. From the sounds of the Spartan faithful around us, it felt a little too good. Of course, I use the term "Spartan faithful" loosely, because if you are a home fan and you only manage to garner tickets in the away section, just how big of a fan are you?

I am willing to admit, I was a Michigan Man of little faith when we were down by ten. I should have known better. No matter what happens, Sparty is still Sparty. They don't want to win by making plays and dominating the line of scrimmage. They want broken plays that result in big gains, odd turnovers, mystery penalties, mystery no-calls, and clock mishaps to result in wins that will be debated for all eternity. This was a real game...not good for Sparty. At the end of a real game, the better team wins. Make no mistake, despite the close call, Michigan was the better team.

That's it. Game over...28-24. 8 quarters remain for the comeback of the century that followed the upset of the century. Bucky Badger...you're next.

The UMTailgate.com roadshow continued with a solid turnout. We welcomed back FryDaddy Frank with open arms, turning out an amazing overkill on food and drink with breakfast sandwiches, cheesy potatoes (of course), pulled pork sandwiches, boneless pork ribs, fried mac and cheese, fried cheese curds, garlic fries, and bloody marys.

Well done everybody...well done. See you in Madison.

See a Screening of Michigan - Ohio State Documentary

​I was just contacted by someone at HBO regarding the Michigan - Ohio State documentary (full spot up on HBO.com now with great Bo interview) that is premiering on November 13th. I have mentioned it several times before. It hit the media at this time last year because it contains one of Bo's last interviews, if not THE last. They are having an advance screening of it in Ann Arbor on Wednesday, November 7th. It's at the Michigan Theater, and it is invitation only. Fortunately, anyone that reads this is invited...as long as there are seats available. The catch? You have to RSVP.

I am heading out with a few tailgaters, so if you are going as well...send me an email and we can meet up. Again..YOU HAVE TO CALL THE NUMBER AND RESERVE YOUR SEAT. Should be fun. The number is 1-888-873-4584 in case you can't read it below. Hope to see you there, and pass it on. Let's fill the place with UMTailgaters!

Six

​Some call Michigan vs. Michigan State a rivalry game. Geography plays a part in that. Just 60 miles separate the two campuses, but I remind you that just a few feet of stone separated East and West Berlin. And that's how different these two institutions are.

To the Northwest, smothered in Green and White, lies Michigan State University. A land grant college (the first in fact), by definition it's an A&M...as in Michigan A&M. It was founded in 1855, but wouldn't become a University until 1955. In 1950, Michigan (yes, we were in charge) reluctantly allowed Michigan Agricultural College to join the Big Ten as a replacement for The University of Chicago, who left the conference in 1946. The University of Chicago stopped playing D1 football in 1939, but its seven Big Ten Football titles is still one more than Michigan State has managed to win since. No, seriously, Michigan State has six Big Ten Football championships. Six.

This is where the inferiority complex comes into play. It's a pretty serious one. Your typical Michigan State fan was shunned by the University of Michigan coming out of high school. (See The Thin Letter). Occasionally, you'll run into a Sparty that will tell you they chose Michigan State over Michigan. And occasionally, monkeys fly out of my ass. But you have to feel for them. You get shunned academically, then you stand by and watch as your school gets dominated on basically every possible field of play for your career there. And while there is dominance in the Big Ten athletic arena by Michigan over Michigan State, that isn't necessarily the problem. The problem is Michigan State's complete and utter ineptitude overall in sports.

Michigan State has 76 total Big Ten Championships all-time in all sports. Michigan has 337. As a reference for MSU's crappiness, Penn State has 41...they joined the conference in 1991. Purdue with 65 and Northwestern with 66, are the only two that are worse than the Spartans. However, Purdue and Northwestern are highly ranked academic institutions. Also of note are Michigan State's 10 Big Ten Championships in the sport they so patiently wait to commence each fall after football falters...basketball. 10 however, is two less than Michigan's 12. Interesting.

The comparisons become tiresome. I find myself pointing out the failings of Michigan State University every year prior to this "Backyard Brawl." Why you ask? Why am I wasting my time with this Big Ten also ran? It's them. They beat us sometimes. 28 times in fact. With this being the 100th meeting between us, the lopsidedness of the matchup speaks for itself. What is truly amazing is that the 28 losses is the second most handed to us by any team. And each one of those losses gives Sparty the notion, if only for a day, that they are as good as Michigan. That no matter what happened in the past...academically, athletically, socially...that day, everything is ok, and their worthless lives suddenly have meaning and purpose. So what do they do when that happens?

Burn down the city they live in.

And the cycle continues. No doubt that on paper Michigan should beat Michigan State once again this year. What is slightly scary about that prospect is that a win this year will make six in a row. A seven game winning streak is difficult to maintain in any series...and paper, well, we all know what paper means. If there is anything that college football has shown us this year it is that on any given Saturday, anything can happen. That adage applies to no one better than it applies to Michigan. So, Michigan State can certainly find a way to beat Michigan, even if they shouldn't. And that sucks. Because just as every other year, and in every possible way...we're better than they are.